Confident masculinity; strong yet gentle. Cuban artist Moník Molinet’s recent photography features men with flowers in their hair. Her Havana Fábrica de Arte exhibit and this theme supports non-violence in relationships. Thanks to Ivette Romero for her excellent reporting on the Caribbean, who brought this important artist to my attention.

Molinet’s photos inspired me to write a poem. In 1999, I married wearing a floral garland. During the reception the two most important men in my life each took a turn wearing it. Wish I had good pics to show of the moments, but disposable cameras plus evening light equals grainy photos. Here’s one of the garland.

Garland
My love wears flowers in his hair
he’s one of few I know who’d dare
I loved him long before that day
we pledged our troth near Río Frío quay
Wearing by night my garland with aplomb
His great big smile and lots of calm
The man who acts from his heart
fears not blooms tip his applecart
Dad and my beloved know the truth
that masculinity requires no proof.
–Rebecca
Guirnalda
Mi amor flores en su pelo usaría
es uno de pocos que lo atrevería
Le amaba mucho antes al amor mío
del día que nos casamos cerca del río
Llevaba él aquella noche mi guirnalda
con una sonrisa grande y con calma
El hombre que actúe de corazón
no evada flores ni salga cabezón
El papá y mi querido saben la verdad
no hace falta prueba la masculinidad.
Traducción por Rebecca
I am lucky I was raised by a dad who is confident in his masculinity and equally fortunate to marry a man who is as well.
Do you know a man who’d wear flowers in his hair?
¡Olé! –Rebecca
In our culture, the groom wears a long garland of flowers, usually roses around his neck on the wedding day.
LikeLiked by 4 people
Thank you, Sadje. What a beautiful tradition you have in Pakistan!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes it’s a lovely tradition.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sounds like ancient wisdom to me, for the groom to wear flowers.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Perhaps! 💝
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wonderful. Loving everything about this post.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks for your lovely comment!
LikeLike
In India
In hindu marriages
Groom put garland on bride
And bride put garland around groom
The garland contains marigold and several other flowers. This ceremony is called Var-mala
In other traditions as well, flowers, garland are used.
Garlands are also used to congratulate, invite people, especially guests.
Similarly, garlands are offered to gods during auspicious rituals.
In some cultures women wear flowers in their hair.
Different flowers have different significance.
LikeLiked by 2 people
What meaningful Hindu traditions. Thank you for telling us about them, Devang!
LikeLiked by 1 person
What a beautiful poem and story! You are a lucky woman 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you very much, Rosaliene! I feel fortunate.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ah, how lovely your wedding must have been. And yes, flowers are for everyone!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks very much, Margaret. It was in a Texas state park and very memorable. 🙂 Yes, flowers are for everyone.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great art and social project!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks, CDL. She is an artist to watch!
LikeLike
Delightful! Your beautiful photo, sweet and affirming lines, and the Cuban artist who inspired your post. 🌼
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Michele. Your comments are warm like a hug!
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙏🏻🤗
LikeLiked by 1 person
I absolutely live this, Rebecca! The artist, your poem, your wedding photo, the message of nonviolence and parity in relationships. Beautiful! Thank you for sharing this. You made my morning ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yay, I just found your comment! How it ended up in spam I don’t know. Thanks for the wonderful things you said. I was hoping you’d get a chance to read this post. I thought the “flower test” might be good for a third date in Portugal for a man lucky enough to make it to that juncture. 😉 Happy reading at your new library.
LikeLike
What a terrific post, Rebecca. Especially love the garland memory! I would wear flowers everyday if I could figure out a way.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks for your comments, Neal. I thought of the recent picture of you with a flower behind your ear when I read about this artist’s work. Wearable flowers as a daily accessory would be beautiful.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is the first thing I read this morning. Thank you for starting my day with such a lovely post and beautiful pictures!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Dr. Starbuck! What lovely comments. You’ve made my morning!
LikeLike
There are, and have been historically, cultures where men wear flowers. In ancient Greece, for example, and the Romans wore a wreath of laurel to symbolise victory.
I looked it up, and found that there is a culture in the south of Saudi Arabia where the men wear floral wreaths in their hair.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks for the historical perspective, VM! Good reminder that many different expressions of masculinity have existed over the ages. I appreciate the information about south Saudi Arabia. I’ll look that up.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I Love this, Rebecca, it reminds me so much of my own father. He loves life and doesn’t waste time worrying about what the world thinks.
Thank you for sharing!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks very much, Sheri. So happy for you about your dad, sounds like a real life-affirming character.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome. And he’s a character, alright. 🤭
It’s a shame men have been taught by society that such things aren’t “manly” enough. Then again.. society’s pretty weird now soo.. who knows what’s acceptable anymore.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, although not all cultures. Inspired by an earlier comment I looked up the men in southern Saudi Arabia. Cool BBC article about it: https://www.bbc.com/travel/article/20181210-the-flower-men-of-saudi-arabia
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’ll check that out, thanks. 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person